Is Pepsi Okay?

There’s a joke online about a more accurate slogan for Pepsi Cola:

The joke being that when one asks for a drink at a restaurant the default request is always coke, but some restaurants sign deals with Pepsi Cola to only serve their product. Therefore there is no coke to be had and the waiter must respond with "Is Pepsi okay?" The joke is that Pepsi is only the choice when there is no other alternative. Ha Ha, internet, you are clever.

The thing is, my father works for Pepsi, so Pepsi is clearly a superior product to Coca-Cola, and that this joke is understood universally makes me a bit sad. But not really, I just wanted to challenge myself to making up slogans for a company. So lets play with your advertising a bit here...

Self Licking Ice Cream Cone: Why You Want to Hire an English Major

Why an English Degree is a Good Thing in the Business World.

                First off I would like to point out what I titled this entry, and I use the word entry because this is going to be more train of thought than strict essay because I graduated fairly recently, and it will be another few months before I want to write a formal essay again. Also the word is off-putting and some of you would likely run screaming into the night if I referred to this entry as an essay, but I digress. I titled this entry “Why an English Degree is a Good Thing in the Business World,” because I, like most literature majors, understand the immense power words have.

                You see how I began with the word “Why”? I did so because it is a simple and inviting phrase that tells you that I will be answering a question and/or proving a point (the fact that no one asked and you might not care is irrelevant; you are my audience and I shall do with you as I please). People like to ask “why?”, and they like answers; so my essay… I mean entry… begins by selling its very purpose to you, because that’s what an intelligent paper, entry, or essay does; it sells you, the reader, on investing your time into letting me sell you my product, which in this world is but a humble idea. That’s right I am comparing word choice to sales. You’re still reading so I still have you. Suck it.

                Upon reading my entry’s title you will also note that I use the phrase “English Degree,” and not “Liberal Arts Degree.” That is because my major was English and this is my blog, also the phrase “English Degree” reads like it has much more prestige and is free of the negative connotation associated with “Liberal Arts Degree.” I cannot speak for the value of people with other majors, because I am not them, and they’re not helping me write this, so why would I let them hang off my coattails? I’m nowhere near successful enough to have moochers. People see “Liberal Arts” and they think “easy” or at best “not focused,” well that’s not true, and to avoid that stigma, boom, “English Degree.” Again I am demonstrating the power of word choice. You see how I make my point seem more sophisticated by using a term no more or less meaningful than the one it replaces, but is more free of the “silly youth squandering an education” connotation of “Liberal Arts”.  Again, I’m using word choice and connotation, both drilled endlessly into my brain by my education, to sell you on my idea and myself.

Myself, Punching Literature with my Brain Fist